Like he did too and I could see myself with him. Oh of course I have had guys pull the vanishing act on me. After 3 years of very challenging relationship, my fianc and I split temporarily ( or at least thats what I thought) because I couldnt stay overseas with him, and I had no money left and either a job in Spain. The fact he can go out and date and not care and I am still very emotional about it. He texts the next day says hes sorry he was so out of it and glad I came by though. And whats more- when you are willing to settle for less attention or investment than you want, everyone can smell it on you and you become less attractive. You finally think you meet a guy who truly cares about you and wants a future with you and then poof its like you dont even exist anymore. Now im actually in the process of talking to a guy that I want a relationship with. I met a guy online. He stopped answering my calls, I checked on his Facebook and he was actually having fun. Email: hello@hayleyquinn.com. And its actually better, because we actually talked. I wont wait again. In his city ughhhh. If you decide to give him another chance, Id make this very clear to him. Anyhow, most of the times these sort of men tend to re-appear out of the blue a month, two or even a year later with the stupid message Hey, whats up. And I do not know how to get through this.. I dont mean dating sites, I mean distance relationships. He told some other people that we work with that he told me that it wasnt going to work because I didnt try and I didnt say much. I guess it was just infatuation and then it wore off. You see, I am very sapiosexual and love to have a banter with like minds and since we both worked in similar demanding professional fields, I felt like he was the proverbial One. I will admit, it hurt pretty bad and out a huge dent to my ego. Then on and off texting, on fathers day I wished him a happy holiday and he said thank you. He said yes and seemed into this idea. I just dont know how will I tell him. Give him space and if he doesnt talk to you then Eff him and move on. This went on for a month. He must know that you can clearly tell what's going on and you won't tolerate his . I dunno if he will meet me after one month or will just ignore me totally. If he generally acts pretty interested in you and his excuse seems plausible, it's okay to give him the benefit of the doubt. We both like each other, just not the right timing for either of us. You continued to contact him and have sex with him after he officially dumped you by text, which makes you a whole lot psycho. He changed his phone number and ghosted me in mid conversation about coming to my birthday. Communicate With Confidence. Can I ask him to start over? you probably wont want to, but trust me later on you will thank me. The first date turned into a weekend. he said he dont want me to get closer, but he still wanna see me and love to be with me (hangout).. its just he is afraid that he dont get to the place where i want him to be.. he said he is sorry for him self because he knows how amazing woman I am. We always got along. Last Saturday he invited me round to his house and we spike about things . Life is really short. Yes, lol, 4 months. at the end, I am away from heartache. You ignored the second indication he wasnt into you by creeping the profile of the girl he actually was interested in, which makes you a bit psycho. I could tell from his pupils he was using again and I was a bit standoffish that night which he realized and I told him I was leaving where before I basically would not willingly leave until I absolutely had to. This weirded me out but i like this girl, shes exotic, very successful, speaks fluent French and just all around cool, shes also funny! Im confused and dont know what to do I met this guy on POF, we texted every day from the end of sept and finally met right before Christmas We have since gone on dates and spent a lot of time together. All I see anymore are complaints and frustrations related to texting. I dont get it! Then right before he went into work he sent me a heart symbol through text (<3) and it made me happy. I recently just broken up with my boyfriend last week.. We being together for 3 years and things were real good untile last year my ex s parents were to move to aus in September 2014 and ask us to come over for my exs birthday for the month so we were really excited and lloved up and everything , when we git ov over we barley did anything he want to sit around looking on YouTube or doing what to do we didnt even anything for our 3year anverssiry but got to babysit while he went off on bikes for his bday I just kind let pass because we were awa then his parent ask us to move over for the year and they had jobs set for us .when we came back something change in him I know he was depressed missing them and the fun had their but I told will be back not worry he had lost his job aswel and I was only temparly working and we were in my dads place to help save moneyjust shorten things down bit basic since we came back I was the one trying looking for and wavering money while just sat in the room wouldnt come out not talk to my dad or anythingso then his mom called and thought of an idea if he went over and worked first and paied mental get over and oblisy pay back when I get over so the was grand like he was still all love and etc into me But plans got change he had to move tso months ago to help out his nann that was sick and he told me dont worry Ill keep in contact and rember I love you and that were still going so I went to see like the odd week or when I could go up and it was great he seem so in love with me he couldnt stop holding me he call and me when I got back home nowthis change we hadnt seen each other for three weeks and I always asked him if he defiantly sure he wants me and he say yes of course I do that I would tell just dont like play me :L and he was one telling the plan and how were getting over and how were going have a great life together but two weeks ago I had talk to him on the phone he seem so happy to be talking me and mention to me about the visa etc and couldnt wait to see me the a few days later I hadnt heard from him so I text him to check up he rang me in the most angry tone I said hello cause of bad recepsion and he yelled at me if youre going so angrey Ill hang up the phoneand wasnt angry at all and I was asking whats wrong what happend and wouldnt say so I ask Im I still going with you and said yes he said I love you talk to you in the morrowing but I rang an hour later to make sure he was ok that could to me and told doing the visa today like we were lament to and he said what ever you want and I said whatdo you mean and he went to were going get along or will be unhappy that we fight all the time whicht dont and blah blah but he was like I always love that do want to be you and miss you but we wouldnt work over their and I said why are you saying this why would you wait tile now to tell when going to go he had told not join to Collge course or other thing s because Will over their so I hadnt got real reason why and it was over the phone he couldnt even say we were over so Im ment to meet him Im Friday and figure what the happend why did he lead me on this far I was devastated that have broken up Im confused my world up side I and I really love him I came a place to stay while his family went of I put the effort in now ihave to now try out a new plan while he house over liveing the life btw he gets everything handed to him So what now, Sounds like too much drama and your making more of an effort than he is. Around 7 months ago I started talking to an old friend Ive have know since I was 12 (Im 18 now) we were great friends and talked a lot almost every day for a few years. I love you Sabrina! It wasnt about anything in particular- just how I viewed myself as an all round package anyway. Etc. Men need their ego to always be fed. too bad for me, I like him a lot. Im probably never going to have a fling again or a relationship with a guy who just came on holiday :(. Very early into our relationship he told me how much he cares for me and that he even loves me.. Ive never been in a serious relationship before so I was hesitant on what I felt but said I cared for him too to spare his feelings. Anyway basically has been texting everyday, and get on really really well have a great sense of humour and banter between us that other people who are not working in music would not necessarily understand? Fetishizing my Asian ethnicity (yes, it can happen to guys too). We met on Tinder texted for a little bit and then met up. At first I was hesitant to message him back but, I thought what the heck. What is known is that you werent very important to him. Is it ok for me to reach back out to him in a week or so? Im experiencing that kind of scenario at the moment. We women have got to stop giving these guys power karma will catch up with him one day, so please dont be depressed over a worthless boy. Me later. For me Its way too difficult to handle, and I just find it very unsensitive and unfair. What the hell is so damn important that you have to be joined to your phone? Maybe I was to clingy, am insecure, told him too much about me. Some guys catch on that you want something more serious, so they disappear. First date went flawlessly (probably the best first date ever and I do go on a lot of dates). Then former Marine finds him in Florida woods. Now, I understand women are getting more and more frustrated with this and I think men are doing this more and more as actually are women. Still, talking without listening is never a good thing. It shouldnt be any of our concern if the said party doesnt want to handle tough conversations. and of course no reply. Now in this case I have not faded out completely, but I have lost interest in her, and since I dont know any of you Im going to be TOTALLY honest lol. She was funny, attractive, fit, and wore glasses (i love glasses!) Hes just not that into you. Think about it and keep looking for someone normal. Sorry I had to be so blunt but during heartbreak we seem to be deaf, blind and somewhat insane. Went on holiday the week after on my own as needed the space . Did you get to see the last episode of GOT? Also how things were so amazing between us. Although I knew at the end of ourr last date that I felt Id never see him again because of a couple of his responses and body language..but I guess I didnt want it to be true. Remember, her not having quality or quantity does not mean she doesnt have a heart (unless shes a sociopath). Hes just 21 (going to turn 22 this year) so all i say myself is hes not mature enough or have the courtesy to let go in a nicer way. We went out on a friday and I talked to him 2 days later on a Sunday when we made arrangements to see each other the next day. I want this relation but I know that its selfish to keep it with so many problems Im dealing with right now(Hes going through so much) she was a 9 when i met her now shes a 6 at most im noticing physical details i dont like and i realize this is because my attraction to her personality is slipping. Like y introduce me to your childhood friends and colleagues and then disappear without a trace after 4 months? We constantly emailed back and forth, had a ton of things in common, and never ran out of stuff to talk about. When I reactivated my profile on the dating site I saw that he was back on. After this incident things between us were never the same. Men who are interested in YOU will be a tiny bit nervous, flirty, stare at you a lot, make plans, and most definitely try to get into your pants. No I havent reached out to him. Why would you want to be with a guy who doesnt want to be with you anyway? I dont date men who ignore me for three weeks. Man, I really miss my husband! Yes, men and women are different, but some things remain the same. He always texted me back. Im sorry youre hurting, but realise that hes just not that into you to take care of youre emotions and perspective. But not him, nope he wanted to be left alone. Clearly I get the hint lol. Just wanted some advice, because I do like him and i am the type of girl that never dates guys because i am way too picky & very independent, but he made me feel so protected and safe i just am having a rough time actually letting this one go. He is there whenever I need him, he listens to me, gives me suggestions. There could be a million reasons as to why he ghosted you, but dont kid yourself on the likely reason(s). This texting game is just that a game so they can play with us. Just a regular conversation with her was excruciating. He read it and never replied so I took it as he no longer wanted a relationship with me so I ended contact. I wanted to make sure I did everything right. he hasnt been in a relationship with a girl who doesnt smoke weed or drink or goes clubbing. He knows that what hes doing is wrong but he doesnt really want to stop since he doesnt think that you have seen through him. We were in relationship for 5-6 months and I started seeing decline in interest after 2-3 months. Funnily enough this made me relieved as I had thought he was a psycho :-). Texts me the next day like normal but its short and not interactive and felt off. I just freeze up. I did end up telling him who I really was and yes he was a little weirded out that I lied I the beginning, but things seemed to be fine between us. Crickets then two days later just sent one more say guess you were. i feel so sorry about your story, the same situation about to happen with me but Im lucky that he broke communication first. You gain a true sense of him as a potential partner. However, Im not ready to get close to someone who isnt aware of what they want. you just support and legitimate what I have done everytime a man I date disappears. Its been almost 2 weeks now. You have to think of you, your children and your possible future child not him! What did I do wrong? I even asked him several times and told him that tif there was someone else that he was into. To state it more clearly, myself and many of my close friends have dated women who at first seem pretty wonderful, but their interest in us as PEOPLE takes a distant back seat to their interest in us as men. Depends totally on what your motives are in confronting. the thing is, i know i deserve more and i know i dont like him that much anymore because of what he did but to be treated this way just hurts on a deep level. I call he doesnt answer. Society, as a whole, has degenerated into a morass of non-judgmental, liberal acceptance of bad behavior and making excuses for those who engage in it. I dont know if I should give him a chance or unfriend him. Men generally arent eager to bet THE REST OF THEIR LIVES on a shallow relationship. Its just like Poof. I was very calm about it , which is better because they expect the opposite. At least not for quite some time. Anyhow. Yes, perhaps he would think you are a drama queen. He broke it off after some conflict with others at club. We had a (what I thought) was a really fun night with this friends and roommates, and I decided to spend the night. if the attraction isnt very strong or decreases the more you hang out (this happens A LOT) you lose interest. I want to be loved and cherish for the wonderful woman I am, not my ability to cook and procreate. Im confused by your actions and I sense that you are too. about an hour went by and I call him he did not pick up at emailed him he didnt respond so what then I went to Facebook to message him at that point I realized that he had unfriended me. I tried to date other guys but after each date I came home even more sad because the fader was a great date, great conversationalist and funny. He might be struggling with alcohol or drugs, he needs money, is dealing with debt, has families issues to fix up and a whole host of problems that are difficult to deal with. I knew all along that it wouldnt last forever but then he started saying things about the future and friends of his Ill meet etc. being a bit insecure I would pick fights with him for no reason and tell him that I doubt his feeling for me.. Needless to say this caused a lot of problems. Men care about the things they care about and couldnt care less about the things they dont. One man I was super interested in . He kissed me multiple times and texted me right after he got home to let me know that he got him safely. In the future when you are out with a man, please be mindful of how much you are drinking. He even assured her he wasnt going to hurt me. Last year I dated 4 guys. He doesnt deserve you in the first place and you shouldnt even consider waiting for him. You will hate yourself when you realize you gave him control when you could have and should have dumped his worthless, selfish, uncaring ass instead. Always wanting to be with me. It completely devastated me because this is not the man that I knew. Another sign) Unfortunately I made the schoolgirl error of drinking on an empty stomach and got very drunk. How do you cope when he disappears from your life? Wtf, go away and leave me in peace. So no contact after a breakup does two things 1) helps us get over the person IF indeed the relationship is over and 2) also makes the person miss you by your absence, Shannon, so needed to hear what you had to say. the line about waiting to have sex only makes sense if he made a serious effort to mess around in other ways (which i get the feeling he probably didnt). I am getting therapy now and i want the day to come when he doesnt consume my thoughts. The next morning she got up very early and said she had to leave even though I asked her to stay a little longer so she could help me, have breakfast etc. Im going through this with a guy and its so not fair that he pushes me away because I WANT TO BE THERE. By the time he does come back around the tables have been turned because now Im not as interested as I once was because you treated me like an option. And other social interaction. He encouraged me to do well and be better. Ethnic background did ask me, how far I had gone with my ex and I was completely honest about it. i didnt understand what was going on at first, i admit i panicked and did all the things i wasnt supposed to do like texting him and giving him attention, i thought of every single excuse why he wasnt texting me back or calling ( busy with work, family issues .. ), i blamed myself for everything and thought am i not good enough? Childish, clearly he wasnt interested so I sent him a text have a nice life. Wow, in reading these comments, there is a lot of crap going on right now with guys! after the first time i completely lost myself. I just really wish they would cool it with their charm before someone who cant handle it gets hurt. I think everything is good. I left on a positive note and we didnt argue . I have read others experiences here and it sounds like many have been through worse (being ghosted after months of dating/being ghosted by the same person multiple times), the burn that I felt initially was insignificant compared to what others commentators had been through. He is currently in the ignoring period again. He asked could he move in, I was still skeptical but I said ok. We were together for 9 months and lived together for 4, we were in love, building a future together. I finally got up the nerve to tell him I love him at around the 6 month markI was sort of expecting a I love you too back because through his actions it felt like he did. Really disappointed that people lack common decency, courtesy and respect in communicating with others. I used to blame it on the alcohol and all his stress in his life and make excuses for him. Like I do not know what he thinks so I do not know what to do !!!! So not together for about 3 years when we started dating. People deal with stress differently! ?IVE NEVER BEEN SO IN LOVE. This is why guys disappear. He offered all his time to me, then poof. I do remember telling him that I was not going to have sex with him and I am sure he at no point forced the issue in spite of our hot sex chat online. Good Luck. We arent exclusive but he ocassionally alludes he doesnt want me seeing anyone else. 3.karma. Why do the ghosting after initiating second date? He is sure to keep coming back for more when you boost his ego. At the end of our freshman year he started becoming more and more distant. This is why we need to be as clear minded and clear vision as possible and make an effort to not get entangled in hopeless love affairs. Thats what Shannon and I were getting at. I saw him again memorial day weekend and we kept in almost daily contact until almost a week ago. Is it the holidays or what? It just hurts cause I really did fall for him and he looked me in my eyes and said how so in love he was. He had to leave for work because his hours were still crazyI didnt hear from him again except for a message Jan 16 that he dropped his ipod in the toilet and he was using his friends phone to tell me he doesnt know when he could afford a new one. He texted back saying Hi, Im headed to bed now. Subscribe to my YouTube channel now.I post new dating. Ill never understand that. My heart is broken because he wont let me in, he wont talk to me, he ignores me but I know he care, I know he want me to be there, I can tell in the way he hold me, touch me, look at me. Cant eat right, sleep or concentrate on anything. I got friendly replies but obviously something had changed.. and then eventually he just didn't respond and I haven't heard from him since. I hear they make a great espresso ;). The only time i find i do this is when Im not in love with the man. 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